Party Hats & Personal Growth: A Toast to Change

Today,  we're talking about  our experiences with alcohol and the decision to stop drinking. The challenges of social situations and the pressure to conform, as well as the benefits of an alcohol-free life. We also touch on the importance of trying new things and being curious, even if it means stepping out of our comfort zones. 

It's all about the power of choosing oneself and the growth that comes from making positive changes!

We’re here for all of it, and we’re excited that you are too

Disclaimer: We can’t promise to stay on topic

Takeaways:

• Not drinking alcohol can lead to improved well-being and a sense of pride in oneself.
• Trying new things and being curious can lead to personal growth and self-discovery.
• Setting boundaries and choosing oneself is empowering and can lead to positive changes in life.
• Overcoming challenges and sticking to commitments builds strength and resilience. Choosing not to drink alcohol can lead to positive changes in physical and mental health.
• Setting boundaries and choosing oneself in relationships is empowering.
• Dating while sober can be challenging, but it allows for authentic connections.
• Not drinking alcohol can improve self-confidence and overall well-being.
• The benefits of not drinking extend beyond personal health to relationships and community.

Chapters:

00:00 Introduction and Setting the Mood
09:58 Exploring New Experiences and Curiosity
27:13 Exploring the Benefits of Not Drinking
35:45 The Impact of Sobriety on Self-Confidence

Links and resources:
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Send us a DM @Pleaseopenmydoor and we'll give our 2 cents in an upcoming episode!

We are refreshing POMD, We'd love your input, fill out a quick 3 min survey here.
Follow POMD on Instagram: @pleaseopenmydoor
Find us on TikTok: @pleaseopenmydoor
Watch our episodes on YouTube: Please Open My Door
For more info about us, check out our website

Have an idea for a podcast? Have a burning question that needs to be answered?
Send us a DM @Pleaseopenmydoor and we'll give our 2 cents in an upcoming episode!

Transcript

Johanne Walker (00:00.078)
One...

andrea (00:00.206)
What?

Johanne Walker (00:04.174)
We're here! How's it going, girl?

andrea (00:04.59)
and we're back. What's going on? I am just peachy over here. It's a, you know what? I feel like it's a little bit of a low energy day. It is pouring rain outside. It is overcast. It's a little damp. I really wish I was, I really wish I was in front of a fire right now. Like someone I know who has not one, but two little stoves slash fireplaces, wood burners in her.

Johanne Walker (00:12.462)
That's good.

Johanne Walker (00:20.429)
It's so gross.

Johanne Walker (00:25.55)
Hmm.

andrea (00:33.87)
wonderful abode. But we're having the best day over here too.

Johanne Walker (00:39.503)
Is that a hint? Do you want to come over?

andrea (00:44.749)
but maybe, I don't know, we'll see. We'll see where this conversation leads us. Dinner by the fire.

Johanne Walker (00:48.047)
Do we need to have dinner tonight?

Johanne Walker (00:53.423)
They're both going today. It's so gross.

andrea (00:56.493)
It's disgusting, like I got home from walking the dogs, it was started raining halfway through walking the dogs, I'm like, I'm damp and not the good kind of damp either. It's like the cold damp, the like, ugh. So I was like, okay, hot shower, here we go. I'm like, oh, I wish I had a bathtub, but that's okay, it's coming. The bathtub is coming eventually one day, but right now I get to have a really hot shower. Okay, that's great. How are you doing?

Johanne Walker (01:06.158)
Yeah.

Johanne Walker (01:16.623)
Yeah. Yeah.

Johanne Walker (01:22.767)
Yeah, right. I'm doing good. Yeah, today's a good day. We had a dinner party last night, so it was a later night than normal for me. And as everyone's leaving at like 12, I'm like, this is past my bedtime. I felt like an official old lady when I said that. Well, I usually, I like to go to bed at 11.

andrea (01:26.188)
Okay.

andrea (01:33.932)
Mmm.

andrea (01:42.059)
Well, past midnight?

Oh, come on.

andrea (01:51.947)
Okay.

Johanne Walker (01:51.952)
That's a really nice time for me to go to sleep. So this morning when I woke up, I said to Dan, I was still a little groggy. And I said, I'm so glad I don't drink alcohol anymore. Cause I was groggy just from like doing a different pace and you know, like, and it was fabulous. You know, the dinner party was fabulous. Everyone had a really good time and, and uh,

andrea (02:06.123)
Mmmmm

andrea (02:13.226)
Mm -hmm.

andrea (02:17.29)
Oh, good.

Johanne Walker (02:20.24)
But I'm so glad I don't drink because I would have had to deal with that today.

andrea (02:25.643)
Yeah, it's like waking up and not being hung over. Maybe feeling a little like that is like that like pasty feeling in your mouth. Like I don't miss that. I don't miss that at all. And when like waking up like foggy headed or it's it's like the whole day is kind of a write off.

Johanne Walker (02:29.36)
Oh, it's like...

Johanne Walker (02:36.751)
Yeah, no, I don't miss that either. Yeah.

Johanne Walker (02:46.415)
The whole day's a write -off, so there's two ways. Either you guide yourself through it and you just suck it up, drink water, hit the electrolytes, punish yourself by working out extra hard that day, or jump right back in. Mimosa's and Caesar's for everyone.

andrea (02:58.121)
Mm -hmm.

andrea (03:02.026)
Yeah, one or the other.

and let ride it on out.

I will say that's one thing that I do not miss at all. At all, because it's like I feel like my weekend is my weekend versus recovery or like, OK, I need to go out for a walk to kind of like flush this alcohol out of my system. Or something.

Johanne Walker (03:14.799)
Me neither. Yeah.

Johanne Walker (03:26.353)
Yeah. And I feel like I never talked about it, like how much it actually affected me because I didn't want anyone to judge how much I drank. Well, if you feel terrible, like how much did you drink?

andrea (03:44.201)
Mmhmm. Mmhmm.

Johanne Walker (03:45.905)
So you quietly suffer? Well, at least for me.

andrea (03:48.552)
Yeah, like over here. Yeah. Where no one can see me.

Johanne Walker (03:54.481)
You're in the bathroom, nobody sees you, and you just head right for the Advil bottle

andrea (03:59.144)
Oh yeah, I remember, oh my gosh, I remember when I lived in Kingston and I was, say in my mid to late 20s, mid 20s we'll say when I was still in Kingston and I remember like I was out partying the night before and I had to teach a 930 fitness class in the morning and I taught it, it was rough. It was insanely rough and I remember afterwards there was this really nice older lady wanting to talk to me and we were friends and she worked with one of the personal trainers at the gym and like we, we.

Johanne Walker (04:14.545)
Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah.

andrea (04:27.976)
Like she was just such a genuine woman and she wanted to chat after class. And I was like, I'm gonna puke right now. I'm gonna puke right now. And I said, you know what, Mariella, I'm like, I just really need to run to the bathroom quickly. Can you give me a couple of minutes and I'll come back and I would love to continue this conversation with you. She's like, of course, Andrea, I don't wanna keep you. So I ran to the bathroom or walk briefly, like quickly, like trying to look casual and cool, but also like kind of holding in the vomit in my mouth and my stomach's just like.

Johanne Walker (04:54.833)
Yeah.

andrea (04:57.928)
And I remember running to the bathroom on the floor, like, you know, doing the thing, like, you know, and then like washing my hands, flushing my, like, and then just walking, you know, doing the thing, you know, doing the thing.

Johanne Walker (04:58.514)
Oh, that's terrible.

Johanne Walker (05:06.482)
What was that? You know, doing the thing. Yeah. We can't even say it. You were sick to your stomach.

andrea (05:15.399)
I know, you know, like I was, I purged, I purged it all. And I remember like splashing water around in my mouth and then washing my hands and going back out and just finishing the conversation with her and then walking home and basically passing it out for the rest of the day. I do not miss that feeling at all.

Johanne Walker (05:38.002)
No. Even if you don't drink, like it's not that drinking to excess, but it's like even just having a couple, you don't realize, you don't realize how it affects you because it's kind of your baseline. Like you're always in a perpetual state of feeling like shit. Right? I think it's the gluten or I think I'm dairy. You know, I ate too much. I had too many potatoes last night. It had nothing to do with the.

andrea (05:38.759)
at all.

andrea (05:56.39)
Yeah. Well, what is it? Does it take eight? It must be.

andrea (06:06.117)
It has to be.

Johanne Walker (06:07.827)
three glasses of wine that you had. I find it so funny. Yeah. But you know what? I lived in that place for a long time. Like I was in denial for a long, long time.

andrea (06:11.814)
That's fine. What does it...

andrea (06:23.813)
Mm -hmm.

Johanne Walker (06:24.019)
And that should have been the first red flag, but...

andrea (06:26.693)
Well, you don't know what you don't know either. Right, because did you realize you were in denial when you were in denial?

Johanne Walker (06:28.915)
Exactly.

Johanne Walker (06:33.587)
Do you realize you're in denial? I don't think I constantly said to myself, like, I know I definitely didn't say, um, why am I drinking? Like I, especially when I first started, when I was a younger Johanne you know, I didn't say like, why am I drinking? It was just like partying. And then as life evolved,

andrea (06:35.493)
Denial when you're in denial? Like, do you, like...

andrea (06:53.124)
Mm -hmm.

Johanne Walker (07:00.467)
You know, it just organically became part of my lifestyle. There was times I drank less, times I drank more. Um, but it just like evolved. But I would definitely say that I never went through like a stage where I was like wanting to get really super clear about why I was drinking. It was just habitual and a lifestyle, I would say. You know, I mean, I definitely changed and evolved into the quality. Like,

andrea (07:03.908)
Mmm.

andrea (07:21.603)
Mm -hmm. Yeah.

Johanne Walker (07:30.132)
more expensive alcohol and beautiful wines and that made it better. But it didn't matter, you know, or I would, you know, cut out the sugar and just drink vodka straight. You know, clearly I had no problem there because I was having a martini.

andrea (07:32.035)
exclusive.

Yep.

andrea (07:43.78)
Yep.

andrea (07:52.579)
No sugar. You're winning. It's like you're on a diet or something.

Johanne Walker (07:55.572)
It's basically a super food. But anyway, this morning I woke up and I was just like, and I said that to Dan, thank God I don't drink alcohol anymore. Cause I feel groggy and tired, but I'm not hung over. And I feel way better. Like I'm relaxed cause I'm a little off today, but you know, we had a great workout. Yeah. Because you know what?

andrea (07:58.115)
What?

andrea (08:08.707)
Mmm.

andrea (08:19.203)
Mm -hmm. We did. I love our Saturday morning routines though. I absolutely adore them.

Johanne Walker (08:25.429)
I know. So what came up last night during dinner was, is that friends, friends of ours, parents are in from the East coast. So they're going to see a Blue Jay game. And I guess there's, yeah, they're at the Blue Jays So they were worried about the weather and we're like, oh, we have the dome. We're in Toronto. So it's covered. You don't have to worry. So they were trying to get tickets because I guess the pitcher, I think it might be the Dodgers. Don't quote me. I'm not a baseball fan. This guy makes.

andrea (08:44.93)
Mm -hmm.

Johanne Walker (08:54.901)
or I don't know, you must have signed a contract for $700 million.

Johanne Walker (09:04.245)
And I was like, hmm, $700 million. And everyone was like, what would you do with $700 million? And then, you know, one of the girls at the table was like, I would pay off all my debts. And I'm like, what? I would be like, well, exactly. So Dan's like, so the other $10 ,000, like, what are you going to do with the, you know, 699, 999, 9000? And I'm like,

andrea (09:07.521)
Huh.

andrea (09:21.408)
What statue have?

Johanne Walker (09:34.005)
forget that I'm like bolted. I'm on a private jet. We are all out of here and the creditors can come and call me and then I'll pay them off as they call me because I don't believe anyone's really caring about your credit score when you're worth $700 million. They just want to take the money and invest it for you so that they can be rich too. So I was like, that's the first thing I'm out of here. And I also said,

andrea (09:48.896)
No. No.

andrea (09:58.08)
Yeah. Cheers.

Yeah.

Johanne Walker (10:04.182)
I know this is crazy. And I also said, and I think I might start drinking again just for like a week, just so I could drink like the world's best champagne. And then I'm like, whoa, clearly I'm still not, even though I'm two years, I'm two years alcohol free, but then, you know, right away I jump in and I'm like, maybe for one week I would just drink.

andrea (10:20.224)
Yep.

andrea (10:27.84)
Like give yourself a free pass for a week.

just to have the experience of drinking really, really fine alcohol.

Johanne Walker (10:35.766)
Yeah, really, really, really, really fine. Like stuff that you couldn't afford. Like, well, I couldn't. But anyway. Exactly. Dan's like, seriously? You would start drinking again with 700 million? I go, it could be a possibility.

andrea (10:44.287)
until you have $700 million.

andrea (10:54.335)
It's up there. It's up there.

Johanne Walker (10:56.022)
Oh, I mean, I don't drink because I want my vitality, but I could be taken out for a week and then maybe hit up like a spa. You could check yourself into like these incredible spas like in LA.

andrea (11:06.591)
No, you would fly yourself and anyone else who was on this bender with you, you would get a private jet, fly to Switzerland to go to one of those like specialty spas. That's what you would do. That's like, that's what I see you doing.

Johanne Walker (11:15.094)
Yes! Yes! Definitely! Doing a full detox and maybe getting a facelift.

Just a little slight tuck

andrea (11:27.23)
Like that makes the most, I was like, that's what you would do. Come on.

Johanne Walker (11:30.967)
That's how I'll bring 60 in. Some little nips and tucks, some IVs.

andrea (11:33.278)
Hello.

Yep. What an entrance you would make.

Johanne Walker (11:40.407)
$700 million.

andrea (11:44.67)
Like what do you what do you what do you do with that money?

Johanne Walker (11:45.302)
crazy.

Johanne Walker (11:49.143)
Yeah, well, I would like to find out.

andrea (11:53.246)
Yeah.

Johanne Walker (11:54.455)
Well, I would help a lot of people. Alanna was like, yeah, you would. Her first is to go.

andrea (12:00.894)
Like starting with me, right mom?

Johanne Walker (12:04.567)
She would be on the plane with me.

andrea (12:06.109)
Yeah.

Johanne Walker (12:11.671)
I just love conversations like that. You know, but anyway, it started out like, cause they're going to see the blue jay game and there's this, I think, incredible baseball player, which is so boring. I like hockey. I like football. I'm not a fan of basketball, but baseball is like the worst. This is a story. This is a funny.

andrea (12:14.557)
Yeah.

andrea (12:22.236)
Bye!

andrea (12:26.236)
Mm -hmm.

andrea (12:38.685)
Oh yeah. It's like watching paint, in my mind it's like watching paint dry. Like it's so boring. No wonder everybody gets drunk at baseball games. There's nothing else to do.

Johanne Walker (12:41.718)
Oh my god.

Johanne Walker (12:47.319)
Exactly. So Dan says to me when we first got together, he got these tickets, I guess to impress me, you know, we're dating and, and he's like, I got these incredible tickets for a Blue Jay game. And I'm like, oh, that's so great. I'm excited. And you know, cause you want to be nice, right? Cause you want to put on a good impression. So we get to the Blue Jay game, really great seats, I guess the people that were playing, it was all very.

andrea (13:09.66)
Yep.

Johanne Walker (13:16.471)
They were very important. So by the fourth inning, I'm literally like this. And I said, I have an idea. And he's like, okay. And I said, well, we could stay here and watch the baseball game or we could go back to your place and have sex. He's like, let's go.

andrea (13:33.755)
AHA

Johanne Walker (13:36.439)
That was the last baseball game I was at.

andrea (13:38.555)
You totally twisted his arm there too, right? Like I could see him, I could see the look on his face being like, let's go. Like no hesitation.

Johanne Walker (13:45.815)
Yeah, he's like, I don't care how much these tickets were, let's get out of here.

andrea (13:52.475)
I love it! Oh man. So good.

Johanne Walker (13:58.776)
So funny. Yeah. Well, I mean, I think that's the cool part about, well, getting to know each other, you know, like how when we first get to know someone, we're like extra nice.

you know, really obliging. Oh, that's new. That's fun. Right. And then as the longer you get together, the more you, um, and well, yeah. And I also think that it's like, when you meet someone, you also get to like experience different things. That's the great thing about having different friends or, you know, a new partner or someone that all of a sudden wants to do things with you. You're like, I've never done that before.

andrea (14:18.554)
Mm -hmm.

Mm -hmm.

andrea (14:27.962)
show different parts of your personality.

Johanne Walker (14:45.175)
That's amazing. I would love to do that. Right? And that's why I think that it's still, and I'm always encouraging the kids and people, my girlfriends and like to do new things. Cause you actually still don't know what you like. You know?

andrea (14:46.028)
Mm -hmm. Mm -hmm.

andrea (15:00.921)
Mm -hmm.

Yeah. Well, I think it feeds into like just being curious about things too. Don't let not looking good or being good at something or never tried it before take you out of trying something new or being curious about something.

Johanne Walker (15:18.137)
Yeah.

andrea (15:19.385)
Can you lead with your curiosity versus like, oh no, we're not doing that? Can you just choose to be curious and try something?

Johanne Walker (15:27.353)
I feel like people are really good at telling their kids, you know what, just stay with it. It's okay, it's brand new. You're not supposed to get it right the first time. You know, it takes practice. That's why there's this practice. So we get into conversation. It's like, you know what, the more you practice, the better you get. The more you'll discover new things about yourself. But it's the same thing. You know, I really live by that. But if you put me at one of those,

andrea (15:38.68)
Yeah.

andrea (15:45.848)
Mm -hmm.

Johanne Walker (15:56.282)
painting places. It's like, I'm no good at this. And I actually don't want to know. I don't want to practice painting. Like, I feel like I take myself out of different things. You know, like, do you ever do that?

andrea (16:01.751)
Mm -hmm.

andrea (16:09.112)
Yeah.

andrea (16:12.823)
Oh yeah, like I remember when I was learning to ski again. So it's something that I did a little bit when I was younger, like grade six, grade seven, and then stopped skiing. And then recently in my late thirties, I started skiing again as something to do in the winter time to stay healthy and move and just enjoy the outdoors. And also to like lighten the mood around the holidays and picking up ski, like getting skis, cause I didn't have skis at that point in time again.

So getting rentals and then investing in skis. And then I actually took some private lessons too. So I would kind of know what I was doing and not just kind of like flailing all over the mountain or running into people. And I remember like, I remember I was out in Banff skiing at sunshine. And I remember the moment where it started to feel like second nature, where it's like you hit that curve of learning.

where it's like, you have to show up and like, you're messy and you might fall and you might suck at it. No, you will suck at it. And it's not graceful. You feel like a baby giraffe. You're like, oh, like I suck at this, but I really want to do this. And like, I remember, I remember at that time before I had that moment, every day when I would drive to the ski hill to ski, I'd be like, I could turn around and go shopping right now. I could turn, no one will know. I could turn around and like go for a,

Johanne Walker (17:07.161)
Yeah.

Johanne Walker (17:20.538)
Yeah.

Johanne Walker (17:29.851)
No one will know!

Yeah.

andrea (17:35.797)
I could turn around and go home and hang out with the dogs and watch TV or do something else or go to the hot tub back at like where I was staying. I'm like, I could do that. No one would know. And I remember I was, I would always be driving there and it may be like a 20 minute drive from where I was staying. And I remember having a conversation with myself in the car and be like, no Andrea, like you, this is you putting in the work. You need to go there. All you need to do, you know what? Like if you want to turn around and go home, you can, but first.

Johanne Walker (18:00.154)
Yeah.

andrea (18:03.477)
you need to go there, you need to drive there and park the car. And then at that point, by the time I drove there and parked the car and found parking, I was like, well, I'm here anyways, I might as well just go up and start skiing. But I'd actually get like, I get nervous and I get clammy and I was like, oh no, cause I'm not good at this. Like, oh, I should just turn around and go home. It's like, no, no, no, like you want this, you bought the skis, go. You bought the season pass while you're here.

Johanne Walker (18:26.779)
Yeah. Yeah.

andrea (18:30.357)
Go. You're not going to get better by thinking about doing it. You actually have to do it. Yeah. And so yeah, like, oh, and I'm like, I remember I had, I had, I booked some lessons and I was practicing and going, like I sucked a bit. I fell. I like, I get nervous sweats and it's like, you just have to show up and keep doing it. And then I remember this one time skiing on this one run and I got to the bottom of the run and I was like, I didn't freak out once.

Johanne Walker (18:36.058)
Cool!

Johanne Walker (19:00.379)
Yeah. Yeah.

andrea (19:00.563)
going down that run. Okay, like I'm at the point where I'm gonna start having fun with this now versus trying to get, stay technical and, or basically like trying not to die or run into a tree. Right, okay, it's like, right? It's like, okay, I can actually start having fun here. I have the fundamentals down, okay? I've reached that kind of like that tipping point where I can actually start to.

Johanne Walker (19:09.115)
Yeah.

Johanne Walker (19:15.964)
hurt yourself like hurt yourself yeah

andrea (19:28.819)
to play or refine my skills here. But the hardest part is getting to that point. Because there were so many times on the way to the mountain that I just, almost every single day that I was like, I could just turn around and go home or go back to the rental.

Johanne Walker (19:33.98)
Yeah, well yeah.

Johanne Walker (19:42.971)
Well, it's like how many times do we actually give up on ourselves all the time before we give ourselves the opportunity to do better?

andrea (19:50.803)
Yeah. Yeah.

Johanne Walker (19:52.22)
Right? It's everywhere. But good for you that you actually stuck with it and did it.

andrea (20:01.009)
Yeah, thank you.

Johanne Walker (20:03.131)
You know? So how many times did you go skiing this last winter?

andrea (20:04.338)
Thank you. Yeah.

andrea (20:08.53)
None!

Johanne Walker (20:11.355)
I know.

andrea (20:14.066)
I know and that's okay. I didn't I have no you know, you know what? I had a really bad knee injury and I still have it. Oh, whoa You know, you're out. Um the year before that I think maybe it was like three to five and then the year before that That's when I had my knee injury. So I think I did like 15 to 20 So Yeah

Johanne Walker (20:14.171)
Such an asshole, friend

Johanne Walker (20:21.403)
I'm joking.

Johanne Walker (20:25.787)
Sorry.

Johanne Walker (20:40.029)
Yeah. Oh no, I'm just joking. I know we didn't, we didn't ski at all. Yeah. I used to ski way more when my sister belonged to her private club.

andrea (20:45.649)
Yeah. Yeah. I want to.

andrea (20:54.225)
Well, anyone would ski more when you're a skier.

Johanne Walker (20:55.74)
People are always like, you have to join the club. I'm like, I did join when my sister joined.

andrea (21:02.896)
I'm her plus one.

Johanne Walker (21:04.604)
Yeah.

andrea (21:06.705)
I'm sorry.

Johanne Walker (21:07.229)
We had so many good times. I literally just skied so I could go in. I was really good at chaleting

andrea (21:13.552)
Yeah, the apres part. I could see you really doing well at the apres

Johanne Walker (21:17.628)
Yeah. I loved everything about skiing. Like I liked the outfits. I liked the turtlenecks. I liked the two pieces. I liked one piece. I liked the head. I love a great turtleneck. Yeah. You know, the first thing I would do when I would look for snow pants is I would put them on and then I would unbutton the top and then flare them out to see how they looked with the turtleneck.

andrea (21:29.648)
You do love a good turtleneck, don't you?

andrea (21:42.)
It's like, how do these look? I don't care how they look on the mountain. I just want to know how they look for the apres. That's the most important thing.

Johanne Walker (21:50.91)
Exactly. Dan's like, wow, you're putting a lot of thought into this. I'm like, yes, I am.

andrea (21:56.336)
It's like, I want outfits. I want to look cute. Does this outfit look good while holding a glass of wine? That sort of thing. Oh man. Yes. So I will say that it is almost two months now since I have decided not to drink even

Johanne Walker (22:03.005)
Yes.

Johanne Walker (22:11.101)
The days, the days, the days. Oh my god. Anyway.

andrea (22:25.999)
casually. It's coming up to two months. So before, before I would have the odd glass of wine here and there. Usually like when I was out on a date or something like that, because you mentioned like when you're out with like wanting to be agreeable and be like, yeah, sure. Okay. And so that was, that was me wanting to be agreeable. Okay. Like I'll have a glass of wine with you. Like, okay. Like, cause I don't want to be that high maintenance right from the get go.

Johanne Walker (22:27.87)
Mmm.

Johanne Walker (22:35.837)
Okay.

andrea (22:53.646)
And then it was, yeah, just about two months ago where I was like, you know what, screw that, no. And so I'm just about two months in not having any alcohol at all and working on my boundaries. And I feel really great. I am...

Johanne Walker (22:58.333)
Yeah. Yeah.

Johanne Walker (23:06.557)
How do you feel?

andrea (23:17.005)
something shifted because it's more like, it's more, and I don't know how I'm gonna, I'm just gonna talk. It might not be succinctly here. That I feel really great and I feel like I like me more and I'm more proud of myself now for being devoted or disciplined with this boundary, with this commitment, with this commitment that I've made to myself.

Johanne Walker (23:41.694)
Yeah.

Johanne Walker (23:46.142)
Mmm, I love that. Yeah.

andrea (23:48.14)
And I didn't realize that it was almost two months until we just started talking. I was like, actually, let me get my calendar. It's actually almost been two months, which is exciting for me. Yeah, like really exciting for me. Not that I've been on any dates yet to see what happens when my boundary is pushed, and it's been me recommitting to my boundaries and recommitting to myself.

Johanne Walker (23:56.926)
Yeah.

Johanne Walker (24:01.342)
That's great, Andrea. Congrats.

andrea (24:17.803)
for the last two months, which has been absolutely amazing.

Johanne Walker (24:18.079)
Yeah.

Johanne Walker (24:23.2)
Wow, that's a huge celebration. It's not easy, you know, like coming up to two years, like two years, May 1st. It's like.

andrea (24:31.723)
Mm -hmm.

Johanne Walker (24:34.144)
It's one of the most.

incredible rides I've ever done. Stopping, like stopping drinking alcohol. It's not easy because you're faced with yourself all the time.

And it's like, you really get to see what you're made of. And then it becomes like this conversation that I have with myself. It's like, how powerful can I become choosing myself?

andrea (24:55.275)
Mm -hmm.

Johanne Walker (25:11.296)
How powerful can I become?

when I keep saying yes to what I know is good for me and not like, surcoming into like, a pressure or a mood or whatever it is, you know? Like, I still, like, when we go out for dinner, I still think, ugh, you know? It would be so great to like, have a cocktail. Cause I still associate with going out as a celebration.

andrea (25:27.275)
Mmm.

andrea (25:43.115)
Mmm. Mm -hmm.

Johanne Walker (25:44.737)
And so that has been the biggest overcoming and the biggest hurdle. But every time I say no and I choose myself and feeling good, I get stronger and I get healthier and it becomes easier.

It's just a muscle flex, right? It's just a muscle flex. And when it's interesting because, you know, people always say it, you know, the hardest thing for them is going out and staying with it. Like saying, I'm not gonna drink alcohol is a big decision, but that's just like, it's kind of the easy decision.

andrea (26:06.729)
Yeah.

Johanne Walker (26:29.601)
And then it's like, what are all the habits that you need to create in place to be able to keep you in integrity with making that decision? Right? It's like, that's where it comes into. So the habits I formed are, is that I'm not drinking today. I choose feeling good. And when I start to feel like I want to have a drink of alcohol today, it's like, okay, what's bothering me?

andrea (26:36.712)
Mm -hmm.

andrea (26:53.16)
Uh huh.

andrea (26:58.888)
Mm -hmm. Mm -hmm.

Johanne Walker (26:59.233)
You know, like what is it? Like what creeped in? Is it like anxiety or, you know, is it an old habit or an old emotion? And I just sit with it and it's like, oh, that's interesting.

andrea (27:13.511)
Mmm.

Johanne Walker (27:14.433)
That's interesting that I got triggered there.

andrea (27:16.807)
Mm -hmm.

Johanne Walker (27:19.329)
So it's just, it's a really incredible relationship with yourself.

andrea (27:24.872)
Yeah. Well, like.

Johanne Walker (27:25.921)
And it goes back, sorry, it just goes back to my why, like why I decided to do this. And it's because I just decided that I wanted to see what my life would be like without alcohol.

andrea (27:42.183)
You are curious. You followed your curiosity.

Johanne Walker (27:43.266)
That's it. And it's way better. I was curious. Yeah. And I'm only two years in. Yeah, I'm still, I'm only two years in. I have a long life ahead of me. So it's like how incredible, like what a great opportunity it is. That's how I look at it. Because if I didn't look at it like that, I'd be drinking. Cause it's easier to drink than to not drink.

andrea (27:50.054)
And you're still following your curiosity. Yeah.

andrea (28:00.231)
Mm -hmm. Mm -hmm. Mm -hmm.

andrea (28:12.231)
Well, how I see it now is that every time I say no, it's like instead of wanting the guy to choose me, so being agreeable, like having a glass of wine with him on a first date or on a date, wanting him to choose me by me stating no and like having a mocktail or a cup of tea or whatever, or maybe simply a glass of water. By me having that boundary, it's like,

Johanne Walker (28:12.866)
period.

andrea (28:41.03)
Instead of wanting him to choose me, I'm consciously choosing myself. And I'm not looking for someone to choose me because I'm already choosing myself.

Johanne Walker (28:46.625)
Yeah.

Johanne Walker (28:55.139)
Yes, and it's like, why would you lower, I mean, not just you, but anyone, it's like, why would you lower your baseline to be for a complete stranger, or even to feel like, to make someone else feel comfortable? Like, what about them? But it's like saying you're gonna go have a cigarette, because a bunch of people are smoking, and then you're like, oh, I'm gonna go out there and have a cigarette too, and you...

andrea (29:08.998)
Yeah.

andrea (29:12.581)
Yeah, because that's...

andrea (29:20.101)
Mmm.

Johanne Walker (29:24.099)
You quit smoking, right? It's just like, it's not about you. I mean, I just, I'm speaking for myself here. It's not about us like lowering our baseline to like appeasing someone else. It's about someone else saying, Hey, why am I drinking right now? Right? Like, it's not about you having to like change the way that you do things, Andrea. It's about them changing the way that they do things to be with a girl like you.

andrea (29:42.084)
Hmm.

andrea (29:48.196)
Yeah.

andrea (29:53.668)
Mm -hmm.

Johanne Walker (29:55.875)
I mean, that's the whole thing is that it takes a certain kind of man to be with a woman like you. But it's not just with alcohol, it's with everything. It's the way that you live your life. It's your job, it's your out view, it's your values. It takes a certain kind of person to be with a woman like you. So why would alcohol be any different in that?

andrea (30:03.844)
Mm -hmm.

andrea (30:09.027)
Yep.

andrea (30:24.419)
Well, it was. It was for me. Until now, it's not. Right? So, yeah. It's where I'm at now. Yeah. Thank you. Thank you. Yeah.

Johanne Walker (30:27.138)
Exactly. Exactly.

Good for you. I love that. So you've created some bios for your dating profile.

andrea (30:39.779)
Yeah, so I created a bio for dating profiles, so I'm back on the apps right now and just starting to get my feet wet again. And we will definitely keep you updated with what what the goings on and what happens. I do, I do. I love meeting new people. I love conversations. I love to find out new places in the city. So we'll just we're starting our journey and.

Johanne Walker (30:53.476)
Yes. Well, you love meeting new people and having fun.

andrea (31:09.826)
We'll see what happens. That's all I got so far. The dating profile has been created. The pictures have been chosen. The bio has been written, and it's live. I have turned off all notifications.

Johanne Walker (31:22.5)
Can you share your bio with us?

andrea (31:25.761)
Uh, sure. I'm recording on my phone, so let me pull it up on my computer because I did a couple drafts because, as you do.

Johanne Walker (31:29.124)
Can you do that?

Johanne Walker (31:35.779)
I'm curious, because you had sent me like three or four different ones that I really liked. And...

andrea (31:41.538)
So in the past, I didn't really up play the fact that I don't drink alcohol. And I didn't even really broach the topic because I was like, oh, I don't even think it's a topic of conversation. It's just it is what it is. And I'm like, no. And I thought about it. And I was like, OK, I'm being wishy washy with this boundary. And case in point, previously when I've gone on dates and I've had alcohol, I'm wishy washy with my boundary because I've had wine. I've had

Johanne Walker (31:58.853)
Yeah.

andrea (32:10.593)
like when I've gone out. So it's like, okay, so this hasn't worked in the past. I'm committed to not drinking alcohol now. And I don't have any shame or it's not like a dirty little secret anymore. I just, I simply don't choose to drink alcohol. So we're gonna put that in our bio. If it's red, it's read. If it's not read, it's not read. But it's like, it will be a topic of conversation when I start a chat with.

any man that I match with or matches with me, because it's important to me. And so my bio, and I think it's 250 characters or 300 characters or less, I think. So I had to condense it, I had to condense it a little bit. So you wanna read like the big, me to read the big long one or the shorter one? I'll read the short one.

Johanne Walker (32:48.164)
Don't look so -

Johanne Walker (32:54.628)
Okay.

Johanne Walker (33:01.958)
I don't care. I'm so excited to hear this. This is huge for you. I know it's such a big deal.

andrea (33:06.975)
It is, like it's been a big week. So I'll read the longer one. So it's a woman fueled by her natural curiosity and desire to savour every moment of this incredible journey called life, chooses mocktails and Americanos, canos, canos, over cocktails and espresso martinis, a small business owner and a movement enthusiast.

Johanne Walker (33:17.093)
Do it.

andrea (33:36.095)
thrives on meaningful conversations and spending time with my two bulldog sidekicks. Drawn to intelligence and wit and appreciates a true gentleman who values honesty and self -awareness. Seeking a man who has a passion for a healthful lifestyle, is eager for adventure, enjoys conversations, wit with a sprinkle of sarcasm, and is respectful of a non -alcoholic lifestyle. That's a long one. And then I condensed it down.

Johanne Walker (33:48.966)
Hmm.

Johanne Walker (34:04.101)
Okay?

Amazing.

andrea (34:07.646)
Yeah, so I'm back on two apps now and in both it does say that I don't drink alcohol, that I'm sober. Not rarely, not sometimes, none. No, not interested. So we'll see what happens from here. I don't know, it feels like it's been a shift in a power dynamic for me where it's like I don't, if he doesn't, like,

Johanne Walker (34:17.285)
Great. Yeah.

andrea (34:37.438)
Like in the past I've talked about well if he doesn't like me that's a him problem, but not a me problem But I feel like it's I'm not just saying it anymore. It feels like I'm actually Living it that sounds like a question. I'm actually living it now versus like oh well Maybe I'll have a drink because I want them to like me and like I sometimes drink alcohol and I'm like no I just I don't know just I don't drink alcohol and if you don't like that, there's the door I

Johanne Walker (34:56.965)
I know.

Johanne Walker (35:07.237)
Yeah.

andrea (35:07.804)
It's not sometimes, it's not at special occasions, it's just simply right now I do not drink alcohol. And if that makes you uncomfortable, that makes you uncomfortable. But I'm not here to make you feel more comfortable or better about yourself by having a glass of wine. Because I care about me more than I care about you. I care about my health and my wellbeing and what I'm up to and frankly alcohol doesn't.

Johanne Walker (35:30.213)
Yeah.

andrea (35:37.212)
fit in my equation.

Johanne Walker (35:41.541)
Mic drop.

Johanne Walker (35:45.605)
What a sexy flex. Just saying. Just saying. Yeah. It's super hot. It's super hot, I'm just saying.

andrea (35:47.484)
Thank you. Thank you. So will I date a man? Thank you. Thank you. Well, you say it's like the sexiest flex you could do. It's not drink alcohol, right? And like when I did drink more, like to excess, it was more like for me, it was like,

Johanne Walker (36:02.181)
is not drink alcohol It's true.

andrea (36:17.115)
get comfortable in a social environment, be open and talk more, be more communicative. And like drinking to excess started happening because I just started to feel really good and I started to have like, I have friends and they actually want to listen to what I have to say. This is great. And now I'm at the point where it's like, I actually can talk to anybody. I don't need the influence of alcohol to be able to strike up a conversation. So why am I?

Johanne Walker (36:20.869)
Yeah.

Johanne Walker (36:34.725)
Yeah.

Johanne Walker (36:45.125)
Mmm.

andrea (36:45.562)
Why am I doing this? And then like after I drink, even if it's only like a couple glasses of wine, I don't feel good the next day. Like I feel foggy, my body feels puffy. Like I don't, I feel like my head is foggy. I'm not happy. I'm not my normal self. I don't like not feeling like myself. And so the thing that I'm having that makes me not feel like myself is what it's an old crutch that I used to help me in social situations, like help feed my...

Johanne Walker (36:53.221)
Yeah.

andrea (37:15.098)
feel comfortable because I was insecure. I'm like, well, I'm not insecure anymore. So why would I choose to do this any further? So it's like, okay, I'm confident and comfortable in myself. So I'm not drinking. I feel like I'm waffling here, but okay, okay.

Johanne Walker (37:18.565)
Yeah.

Johanne Walker (37:25.669)
Mmm.

Johanne Walker (37:35.429)
You're not waffling, you're actually like, but that's the part where you start to get really clear on like what's important. You know, we were sitting last night having dinner and you know, we were starting talking about, I don't know, the kids and my 40th birthday came up. So, you know, pictures started coming up and it was Alanna's boyfriend that said, you look younger now at 56 than you did when you were 40.

And you try to act like it's no big deal. I know. And then I'm like, what do you mean? Alanna's like, oh my God, there she goes. And it's, but I feel that way. It's like, that is the gift of choosing yourself is you'll, you feel better. So you look better.

andrea (38:06.296)
Oh stop. Oh yeah. Keep going. Don't stop talking.

andrea (38:16.184)
Oh God.

Johanne Walker (38:34.186)
Right? And it's like I said, and I've been saying all the way along, if you have stomach issues or eczema or skin issues or you don't feel good or you feel like you have gluten problems, and maybe you do have all of these other symptoms too, stop drinking alcohol and see what's left.

andrea (38:51.255)
Yep.

andrea (38:55.639)
Give it a try. See what happens.

Johanne Walker (38:57.418)
Yeah. You know, we're really building a community here of Americanos and mocktails. You know, because it's like, there's a lot of fun to be had. Like more fun. And it's...

andrea (39:04.407)
mocktails. Yeah.

andrea (39:13.367)
Ha, cause you wake up the next day and you feel amazing.

Johanne Walker (39:17.098)
Exactly. Exactly. You know, and you just, you know, I feel like it's, there's a lot of shame that's involved with, um,

how much we drink, how much we don't drink. I only drink wine. I don't drink hard alcohol. I have the occasional beer. It's just like, and it's like, I don't care how much you drink, actually. You still drink. It doesn't matter if it's light beer or not beer, it's still poison. And you know, I lived a long time in that, where you're just like, you know, but it's just like at.

andrea (39:42.102)
You still drink though. Yeah.

Johanne Walker (39:58.059)
I realized that I'm starting to get arthritis. My joints don't move the way they used to move. You know, you get up and you're like, oh, you know, exactly. I want vitality. I want vitality. I do pilates, I eat organic. I, I, I.

andrea (40:00.822)
Mmm.

andrea (40:06.997)
Yeah.

Hold on, need time to acclimatize over here. Give me 10 seconds, hold on.

andrea (40:16.949)
Okay, okay, I'm good to go.

Johanne Walker (40:25.418)
choose myself, it's like, but it's like, how can you expect to feel amazing and look your best when you're, you know, pounding back two or three glasses of wine at happy hour, because it's fun, you know? And it is fun. I'm not taking away, but it's just, you learn how to have different fun. And I will say feeling great is...

andrea (40:40.213)
Yep. Yeah.

Johanne Walker (40:55.179)
is a much better feeling every day than, you know, that. There's more to life. It's a different relationship. So it's just really fascinating. It's just really fascinating. And it's so interesting because it's like, you just don't, it's a whole new relationship with yourself. Like yourself and it's like, you know, like I said,

andrea (41:20.02)
Yeah.

Johanne Walker (41:24.491)
And I've been saying, it's like, I really had to discover who I was in my family because I come from a long line of drinkers.

andrea (41:32.884)
Mm -hmm. Mm -hmm.

Johanne Walker (41:34.75)
Right? You know, we're martini drinkers. You know, olives and a twist. Grey goose.

andrea (41:42.196)
Nice.

Johanne Walker (41:44.972)
You know, and it's like, you know, I used to drink lattes and then I went to Americanos because they had less fat and they were, you know, better for me.

andrea (41:45.588)
I'm sorry.

andrea (41:57.395)
Yeah. Americanos, they're like a health food, right? Totally.

Johanne Walker (42:01.388)
Exactly. So, you know, I had martinis and Americanos. And so now it's like, I really, I love the feeling of not drinking alcohol. And I stand with it. And, you know, we talked about this podcast and bringing it up. And so we're going to come into tips and tricks on, you know, how to survive.

the non -drinking, you know? Because it's great to like choose, choose I'm not gonna drink, but then it's just like, how do I navigate? You know, my uncle Joe said to me the other, the other day, he's like, so you're still in it, you know? He never drank as long as I've known. I don't think he ever drank, like ever. Yeah, he's 86, he never drank alcohol. Yeah, so it's really fascinating, you know?

andrea (42:31.314)
Yeah.

andrea (42:49.266)
ever.

andrea (42:53.522)
Wow!

Johanne Walker (42:58.637)
You know, and to be honest with you, when I was younger, I thought, oh, he's, you know, like, that's so uncool. Like, how do you have fun? And it's like, oh my God. And now that I'm a non -drinker, it's like, I actually think I'm way cooler. Like, I kind of get it, because he walks with swagger.

andrea (43:02.578)
Yeah, it's kind of boring.

andrea (43:17.554)
It's like, I get it now, Uncle Joe. I get it. I get it.

Johanne Walker (43:27.149)
It's a whole other place. There's this self -assurity that comes with you, right? This, this incredible.

incredible feeling of self -worth, self -knowing, self -trust, anti -aging, sexy flex, more mobility, feeling good all the time, less irritability, you know? It's a really graceful way to enter later years, to be honest. It's really fucking awesome, you know?

andrea (44:03.505)
Yeah, I would say so.

Well, and now I know that like, if my body's talking to me and saying something's up, it's not because I'm detoxing from having like a couple of glasses of wine, or it's like, I feel like my connection to my body has gotten better as well. My connection to self, my connection to my thoughts, my connection to how my body's feeling. And then it's also like, I feel like my connection to friends, my relationships, everything's starting to get.

Johanne Walker (44:17.741)
Yeah.

andrea (44:38.767)
better and clearer and clearer for me. And I didn't realize how impactful it's like I knew in theory and in concept how impactful having a glass of wine maybe once a week or once every other week or like when I was with my ex, it was probably like two to three glasses of wine a week. And I was like, Oh, it's just two to three. And then I was like, wait a second, Andrea, you know, you're a smart woman here, Andrea. Like,

Johanne Walker (44:39.918)
I love this for you.

Johanne Walker (45:07.214)
Yeah, I'm in the wellness industry.

andrea (45:07.343)
like it was a conversation. I'm like, you're a smart woman here, Andrea, come on. Like even one glass has all of the, like it impacts you. And it takes something like, what is it? Eight to 14 days for alcohol to fully like detox from your body. I think it's something like that.

Johanne Walker (45:27.759)
Well, I think it's all dependent on how much you drink and how often and how long. And I think the variables, because I was Googling because Google knows how long does it take to repair alcohol damage, you know, like for brain waves. And I think it's in between five and seven years for a woman. And sometimes it's not. Oh yeah, like.

andrea (45:33.165)
Yeah.

andrea (45:36.845)
W .O .F.

andrea (45:44.462)
Mm -hmm.

Oh, wow. Okay. It was like eight to 12 days. Everybody go check Google. Do you and fact check us please. Because we're just these timelines sound really good. Let's see what Google says. But like I didn't. Yeah. So it was like me sitting down and be like, okay, Andrea, you're a smart woman here. Like, come on, you know that having two to three, like that does something that's impactful, even having one a week. That's impactful. And so.

Johanne Walker (45:58.031)
for just spitting flour balls.

andrea (46:17.741)
I was like, okay, we just need to, we need to let this go. We need to like make a stand for ourselves here and what I want.

Johanne Walker (46:24.879)
Yeah, well, I'll tell you, that's why I don't drink alcohol right now, because it's like, it was taking up too much real estate in my brain. It's like, I'm gonna have one glass of wine tonight, or I'm gonna go out and I'm only gonna have a cocktail, or I'm gonna sip on this. And then, you know, once you have one, then, you know, sometimes you have one and sometimes you have three. But it's like, it just was like a constant conversation. And then it would be like, I didn't think I was gonna drink.

andrea (46:33.805)
Mmm, mhm.

Johanne Walker (46:52.816)
I was supposed to be the designated driver. Now we're all in Ubers on the way home. And then it's like, you know, sometimes I drink too much. Sometimes I never said, oh, I'm so glad I didn't drink. Sorry. I lived in a life of regret, like, oh, I wish I hadn't drank that much. Or I wish I had only stuck to my original deal. I never went, oh, I feel a regret not drinking last night. Like I never had a regret that I never drank.

andrea (47:10.604)
Mmm, mm -hmm.

andrea (47:22.187)
Yeah.

Johanne Walker (47:22.48)
It's like saying, I really wish I didn't go to Pilates today because I feel worse than I did. Like, you just don't say that. You...

andrea (47:28.844)
No, you never leave being like, oh, that sucked. I need to go back to bed now. Doesn't happen.

Johanne Walker (47:34.16)
Exactly, exactly. So it was like changing my mindset and where my priorities lied for myself. And it's like easier for me to like, take it off the table. Like I was talking to my niece, Christine, she's been sober for four years. And, and I said to her, you know, why? And she said, I just decided that it was easier to not drink than to have the odd drink.

andrea (47:41.77)
Mm -hmm.

Johanne Walker (48:03.504)
And I was like, me too. I mean, she said it differently, but that was my surmise of it. And I, yeah, and I was like, me too. Like I totally get it. And then it's like, well, now that it's like, now that I'm not drinking, like now what am I going to do?

andrea (48:10.219)
your Cole's Notes version.

andrea (48:22.089)
saving a lot of money by not drinking.

Johanne Walker (48:24.624)
saving a huge amount of money. And I think it's like investing into my future because I look around at a lot of people that are aging in their 60s and 70s. They're on high blood pressure medication. They have stomach issues. They're fighting something. It's limitless.

andrea (48:50.314)
Like there's something going on. Yeah.

Johanne Walker (48:53.137)
Yeah. And for me, it was like, it was the weight.

andrea (48:58.889)
Mm -hmm.

Johanne Walker (48:59.377)
Right? Like I was like on yo -yo. Cause alcohol just makes you fat.

andrea (49:04.297)
Yeah, well, even like looking at pictures from you, even from like three or four years ago, we'll say before you stopped drinking, it's like your face just looked really puffy. And now, like I mentioned that to you this morning, I was like, your face is leaned out again. And you're like, oh, thanks. Right? But you don't realize how, because it's, it inflames your body.

Johanne Walker (49:16.176)
Yeah.

Johanne Walker (49:24.241)
You

Johanne Walker (49:29.872)
Yeah. Oh god, yeah.

andrea (49:30.28)
So you get puffy, you retain water and it's like when you stop having that, when your body kind of like brings itself back to, it detoxes itself and brings itself back to homeostasis, it's like all that extra water weight tends to just whoosh away.

Johanne Walker (49:45.714)
Right? And even if you don't, like there's lots of people out there that, you know, that sit at their goal weight or their ideal healthy weight and they, and they drink quite a bit and they don't feel like, you know, there's a problem because, you know, they got it all going on. They're still, they're functioning, alcoholics, you know, like look at me, I can eat and drink whatever I want and I don't gain weight. I'm the exception. I'm just like winning at life here. And it's like, you know, but how's your mental health?

andrea (50:01.895)
Yeah.

andrea (50:05.864)
I'm the exception to the rule here.

andrea (50:15.208)
Yeah, how are you feeling really?

Johanne Walker (50:20.05)
Like, can you really tell the truth about yourself? You know? And it's like everyone has their own path and it's just like, you know, I just feel like it's just really important to talk about the benefits of not drinking. Like the real life stuff, like sex is better. My relationship, I'm a better mom.

Right? I'm a better wife. Yeah. Yeah.

andrea (50:45.977)
They're better human, full stop, all right? Like everything gets, like, and like I'm only two months in and it's like, I just feel, think.

Johanne Walker (50:54.834)
Can you not say it like that? You're only two months. You did this to me when I was two. Andrea, you said, I think you really need to change the wording around that. You are two months in. Yeah, you're not only two months.

andrea (50:59.687)
I know I did, I was like, oh. Oh, dang.

andrea (51:07.398)
I'm two months in. I'm two months in and I'm really excited to see where I'll be in another two months or another six months or even another week.

andrea (51:19.846)
Right? Because I know that like my boundaries will be pushed. Right? Being back on the dating apps now, I know my boundaries will be pushed, but I'm very firm in my boundaries and I'm choosing me versus.

Johanne Walker (51:32.179)
Andrea, I can tell you it's two months in and you have already made, like when you make one choice like this, even though you didn't drink a lot, like you really, like you didn't drink a lot, but the fact is that you were waffling, but you were waffling there, but you were waffling like in different places. And the fact that you did this, it's like, I see a difference in you as your best friend in so many other places.

andrea (51:43.11)
No. No.

andrea (52:02.181)
Yeah. Thank you.

Johanne Walker (52:02.322)
You're glowing. I'm so happy for you. I'm proud of you too. I'm really proud of you. And it's super sexy.

andrea (52:06.213)
Thank you. Thank you. Oh, thank you. I think so.

Johanne Walker (52:14.707)
Yeah, it's super sexy. Because I sure didn't miss out anything. Dan and I were the only ones that were not drinking. Actually, that's not true. Yeah, there was, we were three not drinking and there was one, two, three, four, five drinking.

andrea (52:17.732)
Yeah, so...

andrea (52:26.007)
Oh, last night you mean. Okay.

Johanne Walker (52:39.539)
And it was amazing. I had mocktails and you know, we were having a great time. The conversation, I remember everything that was said.

andrea (52:53.06)
I love that. I love that.

Hehehehe

Johanne Walker (52:59.284)
The kids got on conversations thinking I looked better at 56 than I did when I was 40.

andrea (53:04.676)
How could you forget that conversation though? That's gonna be ingrained in your mind for the rest of your life.

Johanne Walker (53:11.092)
Yeah, honestly, it feels like it feels really good. It feels really good to be proud of myself and to have my adult children really proud of me and setting examples for what's possible. But it doesn't matter how far you go down one road to like stop and like pivot and go in a different direction.

andrea (53:23.587)
Hmm.

Johanne Walker (53:41.012)
Right? And it's not just by like, well, the good old days or, you know, a lot of people, the older they get, the better they were.

andrea (53:51.394)
Yeah.

Johanne Walker (53:53.524)
You know, like it's literally like constantly evolving and changing. And I'm doing it for myself, but I also take a lot of self responsibility for me and my community.

andrea (54:06.146)
Yeah. Well, it's you are, you are a role model and you don't know the ripple effects that you are creating for people or the impact that you're creating for people by just choosing to live, how you choose to live your life. You don't know who is watching. You don't know who's being inspired by your choices unless someone comes up to you in the lane way and says like, Hey,

Johanne Walker (54:07.22)
And it's like, I want to do better.

andrea (54:33.218)
You're doing really great. I noticed this and it's inspiring me to do this, right? Unless someone tells you, right? You have no idea.

Johanne Walker (54:37.012)
Yeah.

Johanne Walker (54:40.565)
What's so crazy is that Kassandra said to me, I don't know, maybe like, I don't know, it was a year ago. She said to me, I love, you're so much more.

What'd she say? You're so much more predictable and level -headed now that you don't drink alcohol. And my immediate reaction was to like spin my head around and go, what do you mean? I wasn't before. Like, of course I was, you know? Like, honestly, that was my immediate go -to. You know? Like, cause I'm the mother and it's like, I had this and I realized I needed to shut my mouth.

andrea (55:16.8)
Uh huh.

Johanne Walker (55:24.853)
and hear what my daughter had to say at 35. And it was, I didn't realize how, I guess, unpredictable I was, or erratic. And instead, like, why would I be defensive on my kids' thoughts towards me? And I was, it was my immediate. And then I was like, calm the fuck down, Johanne.

andrea (55:35.904)
Mmm.

andrea (55:49.248)
Like take it down a notch or five.

Johanne Walker (55:51.062)
Yeah, yeah, and be like, and actually it was an opportunity for me to own my actions. Like it was an opportunity, yeah, like it was like, okay, and I'm not that person anymore. And this is a moment that she's saying good for you, and I love you so much more because you're my mom.

andrea (55:59.456)
Wow.

andrea (56:17.567)
Can you choose to take that in versus the what? Right, like the reaction.

Johanne Walker (56:20.918)
Yeah, I know, but it was a moment like, yeah, because I always considered myself to be a great mom. I'm a great mom.

andrea (56:34.271)
drinking a margarita. I'm the best.

Johanne Walker (56:39.478)
God, I'm good. You know, I never do anything that I'm going to regret because I'm the mom. I have it all figured out because I'm the mom. But you know, I still don't have it all figured out, but I do feel a huge sense of pride and, and love for myself that

andrea (56:40.415)
Hehehehe

andrea (56:46.078)
You

andrea (56:52.062)
Exactly, exactly.

Johanne Walker (57:08.598)
I am more level -headed. I do see that. And what she did say was true. It's just that I knew it. I just didn't want her telling me it.

andrea (57:18.238)
Mm -hmm, because then she sees it too. Okay.

Johanne Walker (57:20.119)
It, yeah, right? Like it's weird. It's like, it's like people know you, especially your kids and you're accountable for your actions and the good, the bad, the ugly. And part of me was like, you know what? This is, this is the life that I want. Right?

andrea (57:33.63)
Mm -hmm.

Johanne Walker (57:45.271)
It was a hard life. It was tough. It was really tough. I was like...

Johanne Walker (57:53.943)
You know? Cause we all get a little messy. But I'm not messy anymore. You know? And we're all on the same field together, like me and my kids and my family and my friends and I'm not better than anyone else. I might have more life experience, but you know, if I want respect for my kid, I gotta fuckin' earn it.

andrea (57:54.237)
Oh.

Yep.

andrea (58:19.612)
Yes, you do.

Johanne Walker (58:21.239)
You've gotta earn it. You want respect from your friends? You've gotta earn it. You know?

andrea (58:25.82)
Mm -hmm.

Johanne Walker (58:30.68)
You want respect from your husband, you need to be respectful. They've been some really tough lessons for me over this lifetime. And here I am, you know? So, yeah. So I'm proud of you, thank you. Yeah, yeah. Because as a partner, like I've seen the shift for you. As your girlfriend, I've seen the shift for you.

andrea (58:40.892)
Yeah.

andrea (58:49.02)
amazing. Thank you. Thank you.

Johanne Walker (59:00.471)
and I'm really happy for you.

andrea (59:02.331)
Thank you. Thank you. It's very exciting. Yeah. We'll see what happens next. Okay. And here we are. So give us a like, give us a follow, share with your friends. We are revamping. We're in the middle of revamping the podcast. So as our listeners, we would love to get your feedback on what you look for in a podcast, because we want to cater everything to what y 'all are looking for.

Johanne Walker (59:03.96)
Yeah.

Yeah, yeah. Okay, here we are.

andrea (59:31.034)
So we have a wonderful three minute or less survey and we'll leave the survey link in the description notes and we would love, love, love if you could take those three minutes and just give us some feedback, please.

Johanne Walker (59:42.392)
Yeah, we would really appreciate it because we really want to move into.

not drinking. Like that's where we're really focusing because it's been a journey for us and we just want to share it and then we can all be on this journey together. Building a community of Americanos and Mocktails.

andrea (59:55.994)
Uh huh.

andrea (01:00:04.153)
Exactly! In the best possible way! Bye!

Johanne Walker (01:00:09.561)
Hehehehe

Johanne Walker (01:00:15.225)
Bye!